Addiction: Crossing The Line
There’s a point that arrives, when I’m helping someone think about their struggles with addiction, that goes something like this:
Them: ‘I wish it could be like that.’
Me: ‘Why can’t it be?’
Them: ‘I don’t want to get lost in all of those fantasies, those dreams again. That’s when I go crazy.’
Me: ‘Maybe you wouldn’t, now.’
People need to wish for things without being obliged to have them, or to feel devastated when they can’t find what they are looking for. Addiction happens when ‘I can’t survive without this’ somehow gets encoded within ‘this is what I want’. It’s the nasty little ghost that haunts desire, and which whispers irresistibly, but so softly it can barely be heard: ‘get it, get it now.’
If you do something, and you keep doing it, and you can’t stop doing it and it’s ruining you, that’s probably addiction.
So while you find out how to curb your dependency, to unhook yourself from that intensity, you may give up a little on wishing.
One day you’ll need to cross the line again and see what happens now.