I’m sorry, there’s nobody there
On Friday I rang my bank to ask about something and became stuck in a queue of other callers. As I waited a message kept repeating, and it ended with a mechanical-sounding woman’s voice telling me she was sorry for what was happening. ‘I’m sorry,’ she said, before mentioning something about what was going on. When my call was eventually answered I asked the man speaking to me who, exactly was sorry for what had happened to me.
‘We are,’ he said.
‘That’s not what your recorded voice says. She says ‘I’.’
‘She isn’t real, is she?’
‘So nobody’s sorry. Could you pass this on to your supervisor for me, please? How alienating it is to be told someone’s sorry for something, when nobody is?’
‘I can transfer you to the complaints department.’
‘No. I’d need to wait. Can you tell them?’
‘I’m sorry, but I can’t.
‘That’s ok. You’re doing your best.’